There was a time when men strove and fought for the favor of a lady. They won the hearts of said ladies by exhibiting their prowess in providing shelter, hunting food and vanquishing evil foes. They were strong and swift, gallant and noble. Oh, how times change. Since food and shelter are now obtained by earning enough money to pay someone else to get it for you, the scrawny and sickly are equally able to provide these as the buff. This has allowed men to explore the softer side of their talents, hence, we have "American Idol".
Far from the biblical face off of David and Goliath, we have instead the clash of the Davids and I doubt either one has heaved a stone or any other projectile at anyone, although I suppose that would make "Idol" much more interesting. No, to win the hearts of their adoring, training bra-clad fans, they show that they have soul and sensitivity and "a voice like melted chocolate". With these Davids, the Philistines would definitely have prevailed.
Recall the dilemma faced by Penelope of "The Odyssey" when she faced a house full of suitors. She challenged them to string a giant bow and shoot an arrow through 12 axe handles lined up. The one that could do it would be her husband. Imagine instead if she'd gathered the village and had a sing off and let her neighbors vote on the winner. Homer would've died in shame and misery instead of all of us, centuries later, having to write highschool papers about his works.
Then there was Jacob in the Bible who showed his future father-in-law that he was dedicated and hard working by laboring 14 years before marrying his beloved. I doubt Laban, or Rachel for that matter, would have been very impressed if he had said, "Nah, but listen to how I can sing!" Then where would that have left the house of Israel?
But do not fret that the epic battles of today do not involve muscular, grunting, and sweating men. At least these modern heros are less likely to be interested in marrying your daughters.
Far from the biblical face off of David and Goliath, we have instead the clash of the Davids and I doubt either one has heaved a stone or any other projectile at anyone, although I suppose that would make "Idol" much more interesting. No, to win the hearts of their adoring, training bra-clad fans, they show that they have soul and sensitivity and "a voice like melted chocolate". With these Davids, the Philistines would definitely have prevailed.
Recall the dilemma faced by Penelope of "The Odyssey" when she faced a house full of suitors. She challenged them to string a giant bow and shoot an arrow through 12 axe handles lined up. The one that could do it would be her husband. Imagine instead if she'd gathered the village and had a sing off and let her neighbors vote on the winner. Homer would've died in shame and misery instead of all of us, centuries later, having to write highschool papers about his works.
Then there was Jacob in the Bible who showed his future father-in-law that he was dedicated and hard working by laboring 14 years before marrying his beloved. I doubt Laban, or Rachel for that matter, would have been very impressed if he had said, "Nah, but listen to how I can sing!" Then where would that have left the house of Israel?
But do not fret that the epic battles of today do not involve muscular, grunting, and sweating men. At least these modern heros are less likely to be interested in marrying your daughters.
7 comments:
Ray the dangerousness of this post can be compared to criticizing Islam and the prophet Mohamed. If any of my teens read this ( especially that last line) I would be stoned in my own house and I don't mean that in a Bob Marley sense but rather in a Shirley Jackson's "The Lottery" type scenario. Are you trying to get me killed ?
Oh and by the way. There was some serious weeping and wailing in my house tonight after teen- boy's loss.
You shouldn't worry so much if your daughters are Idol fans. They are the intended audience. Now, if your boys are watching (and/or wearing a training bra), it's time to get them out doing some yard work or changing the oil.
There's a show that's worse. The other night, I caught a glimpse of Dancing with the Stars. When I saw the way those guys moved, I threw up a little in my mouth.
I confess, I have never watched a full episode of "American Idol" in my life. (or "Lost" although there's a cast member that goes to my gym) But the bits and pieces I've seen makes me wonder if a lot of the contestants applied for gun permits in India.
Now insulting ballroom dance...there's a reason that the guys my friends and I fought over to be partners with we did not fight over to date. Nor were they very interested in us...
whitnie said that no one can insult her husband like that. David Archuleta suffered a great loss so don't hurt his feelings whitnie says that she will have you know that her new last name is going to be Archuleta. In fact, she is typing this right now. OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!
But whitnie, what would your husband Zac Efron say?? wouldn't he get a little jealous?
no. Zac Efron is still going out with Vanessa even though she totally played him. BTW, this is still Whitnie.
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