Saturday, May 17, 2008

The Noon Duty

I am a noon duty. Why? because the office ladies asked me to do it and I feel guilty saying no to anything that helps support the kids school. Oh and because the office ladies are so nice and soft spoken and pleasant. If they asked me to rob a bank I might consider that too.

I love to see my kids during the school day and they feel so famous when I am there. The other kids say things like " hey is that your mom "? and they just beam with pride. I try to act cool so that the kids won't say things like " your mom is so mean"! I walk around the lunch room and try to keep the kids from having food fights or eating each other. Sometimes I tease the kids which is great fun... for me. I might tease the kids about their haircuts or bed head. There are so many funny looking kids. If you don't bother to brush your kids hair in the morning, at least you are providing people like me with a good laugh. I appreciate that.

Other things I have observed are:
A kid trying to saw another kids head off with a fake saw for sawing snow
A kid stuffing snow down another kids coat and shirt
Kids throwing away entire lunches including whole sandwiches and whole bags of chips unopened ( I bet you think your kid would never do that)
whole rows of 5th and 6th grade girls who think eating anything is gross and nerdy
A kid trying to make another kid eat gravel
A kid trying to make another kid eat yellow snow
Kids playing catch with a dead bird they found
First graders drinking coke for lunch
6th graders eating baby food out of a jar
girls that cry ( this is everyday and every grade) because their best friend said they weren't friends anymore
Kids that raise their hands at lunch to tell me that someone won't stop looking at them
Kids that raise their hands at lunch to tell me that their mom just had a doctors appointment because they need medication for depression

I do try to encourage the kids to take their whole sandwich home so that someone else can eat it but the expression that they give me says that they will throw it away later.


ray said...

sawing heads off, eating gravel, dead bird catch - do my children go to your school? Sounds like it.

the burning question remains: do you wear a hairnet?

Tim said...

I loved the, "my mom is getting medication..." part. It's amazing how much you find out about families when you hang out with their kids for a while. I've heard some pretty funny stories on campouts. Like, "my dad made us go to a construction site at 4 in the morning to pick up some rocks we used for landscaping. I asked my dad if we were doing something illegal. He said, "no, they are just going to throw them away anyway." So, I asked him why we needed to go at 4 in the morning." That was our bishop's kid. Another scout was talking about how his mom was driving his dad to work each day. When I asked him why his dad couldn't drive himself, he got a bit sheepish and said, "I'm not allowed to say." I finally got it out of him that his dad was about to lose his licese because of too many tickets. These are probably funnier when you know the dads...

Ambie said...

Recently at dance class a little girl I was sitting by said started talking about her family and said that she had a sister in China she wasn't allowed to talk about... and did I want to hear about it? Oh dear. Her parents would have died.

Ambie said...

I'll never tell Ray, that's top secret information.

ray said...

My all time favorite is the second grader who took lingerie to school for show and tell and said, "when my mom wears this my daddy chases her."

Ambie said...

Alright no chasing in front of the kids

Cheryl said...

Come on, spill it about the hairnet!!

When I was a kid, the lunch ladies were ancient! The kids are lucky to have you there!!